Draw

When she says my name, its unmistakable, there is a calm surrender in my ear.
A fog in the night of a blistering summer day, a beacon of hope to an all consuming fear.
I am but a piece to this movie in which we've been so flawlessly cast.
But the beating of my own heart, to calm it now, is all I ask.
It jumps at me, unaware of my mind's attempts to calm my ever tumultuous heart.
Wishing emotions were a trigger, wishing I could control some part.
Screams, of joy? Memories. Of terror? Memories. Of confusion? Now.
My eyes blink slowly as she shakes me. The curtain drops, my eyelids bow.
My heart is not the problem, nor my soul or mind,
The issue is my body, as the signs all do remind.
The drugs will keep me going, for longer if they take.
But if they fail one more time, it'll be my last mistake.
Your touch reminds me, words keep me strong, in case I fall asleep.
My mind is warped by all this pain, I'll get through this with you,
Brothers, sisters, parents and friends stand by me through and through.
Walking now, steps slowly, blood rushing to my head.
The pain of so long, just a moment ago, I felt dead.
Surrendering to myself, that I could not go alone,
Brought me here to all of you, made this world my own.